For about two months now I have already had the plan to fail this year... what for?!?
First of all I indeed think a positive mindset can work wonders. And this is a story of how I will enjoy redoing this year, instead of being depressed and miserable.
Well, right now I'm taking part in a great Dutch education system, in the toughest level called 'Gymnasium'. From the beginning when I got my 'cito-toets' scores, it was said to me that I was probably going to struggle at this level, being raised up with two languages and all. The first couple of years were hard work, like I see my sister doing homework all day now, but still too easy. I just barely made it through the 10th grade (4e klas) to where I am now, but I probably shouldn't have. The effort I put into school just slowly faded away; got too busy with more stuff, ideas and distractions. I am always late for classes, or actually anything really. And I set those limits WAY too high in always putting off homework til the last second - just like packing.
Having said that, my grades for this year are not good enough to pass anyway... But here comes the interesting part of this story. I actually have been trying to get averages just under passing, in order not to pass this year by accident. My mindset is: "I don't want to pass!" And I'll explain you that now.
Probably around a year ago I started getting interested in University studies, particularly in the United States. As an American, I've never lived in America but do have most of my family there! Therefore, I'm wanting to go study Architecture in Chicago, which is just 3 hours driving away from my closest family!
So anyway, these American Universities require (P)SAT test, terribly high GPA's (Grade Point Averages) and such to get in. And as we all know, American University is expensive, so you'll need to get some good scholarships! In the Netherlands you just need to have a final average of 8 and you can probably already get in at TU Delft for example. The grading system in Holland, is 1 through 10. I heard/read very late in this stage, that the University I'm planning to attend, will look at ALL of my final grades (rapport cijfers) over the last three (/four?) years of school! Meaning: the University/College will use all of those grades to a GPA on an A through F scale (why not E?), and use also my SAT scores of course, combined, to award me my scholarship.
SO BASICALLY: With the grades I have now, the chance of me receiving less money (which everything's about of course) is going to be way higher. Why? Well look, if I were to pass this year and go on to the final 12th grade, I would probably fail my exams due to insufficient knowledge of e.g. Chemistry and Physics. It would be way better for me to do this year over, opposed to the sixth year.
Another bunch of reasons why I'm so joyous about all this, is because of all the positive outcome it would have:
1. I would be able to spend another year of my life in the beautiful city of Amsterdam!
2. My family for one, also still lives here so I would have another year at 'home', spending more precious time with them... cause who knows where I'll turn up after studying in Chicago? Not in Amsterdam, I expect.
3. Right now, I have a special type of 'verblijfsvergunning'; staying permit that doesn't allow me to get a job legally. By the end of 11th grade, I would be 18 and then also able to build up a better CV, my working experience could improve more and provide me with more opportunities.
4. The class I would come in is not so bad at all, I've already got some good friends and even neighbors there that I could enjoy the year with.
5. I don't think I'm quite ready to move off to the amazingly corrupt, capitalistic yet awesome country of America to study independently in Chicago! That's a whole new world and kinda uncharted culture to be in at eighteen.
6. It would give me a chance to redo the SAT's as a 11th grader. Resulting in of course, better scores.
7. Convenience: me and my two sisters are each 3 years apart. The youngest one is 6 years younger than me, meaning I would normally not be able to be in the same secondary school as her. Now that I'm redoing the year, all three of us will most likely be in the exact same juniorhigh/highschool! That is just one awesome thought.
And many others..
When people see the happy look on my face after I say I want to redo the year, I laugh. Somehow, I turned everything around to make failing the year a fun thing. From not trying to fail and just barely make it, I went to trying to barely not make it. Finally, money wise, does one extra year of extra Dutch public school payment way up to the possible costs that University with these scores? I think, that I'll be way better off paying the small year price this year around, plus University, opposed to the massively expensive University in one, giant leap for mankind, and for John of course.
This was another extremely long yet informative blog post by John Ashworth, thanks for reading!